Morning coffee

What a night... I´'ve been sleeping two hours in a bus but not more than that. And I've been eating way out of line... not sugar though which is a good thing despite the calorie amount.

First I was drinking coffee with Aya (a friend from my summer work) and dreaming of leaving all this shit... mainly meaning Finland, cold, snow, stupid people and so on behind. I think I really might be going. Overall leaving is so damn easy.

After I met with Aya I went to sell those tickets I had promised. Yuki and Yan accompanied me and we had so damn fun... you know the situation humor that doesn't make any sense. Around midnight me and Yuki went to Hesburger... man. I couldn't but have a double cheese meal even though I didn't eat half of my fries. But we had really nice conversation... firstly I was joking about the caffeine pills; I eat them at nights like this to stay awake the next day too. Before I ate them to stay awake and feel so horrid that I couldn't eat. Yan took also one and she turned really wild.
   But yea... I was like "man... I cannot take another one yet so that I don't go overboard like I used to." At this point she know already that I had taken them triple amount.
"They aren't probably the healthiest way to stay awake..." Yuki said.
"No... but you know, gotta stay up and function the next day too. If I could go to sleep like you it would be different. Main thing is that I don't over do it like I used to and further more they are probably the healthiest thing I've done to myself in my high school years; In high school I had issues and my issues had issues."
She smiled faintly and laughed slightly to my way of expressing things.

But so yea. Now it doesn't come behind the tree if I tell her at some point. I don't need to be so extra careful.

Yuki is so adorably incredibly sweet. I paid part of her night bus so she could get home and around 1am she was so damn tired that her eyes stayed barely open but she was sitting there just to keep me company... I cannot ever describe how much that means to me. She didn't tell me this but I could see it. She felt bad for asking me to sell those tickets and making me leave at mom's without any sleep at 3am - and when I said I'd pay her buss so that she could get home after 10pm when they rise the night fee for the trip she probably felt that she had to stay with me and leave with the last buss around 2.30am which would have left me perfect half an hour to walk to the buss station.
   She ended up leaving round 1.30am cuz she couldn't stay awake any longer. I went to wait a buss with her and told her to get home safely. The good bye was awkward ^^ I'm sure she was about to hug me but then she changed her mind after moving her hands the two centimeters. Outcome was so teen movie and first dates and OMG what I'm supposed to do. Funny but definitely not dangerous... as far as I can see our relationship is looking it's way of being. We have been hanging a lot within this past month and that's new, totally new. So it's only natural that these kinda physical contacts take time to develop to the level we have with Ran, Sheng, Meng and Yan. If one says she's cold the others are immediately hugging her and rubbing her arms. But where ever this id going with Yuki I have a feeling that we're gonna get closer each other and when Ran comes back for me and one other girl comes back for Yuki... idk what will happen - I'm trying not to fear that because that right had of Yuki is coming way sooner than Ran and I don't wanna feel left alone again.
   Soon she texted me that she was home and that she was sorry for not being there longer. I told her not to think about it... that I had a white-chocolate-cheese cake with me and it was almost good company even it doesn't reply when you ask something. She told us to have fun and I finally I told her to get some sleep and not to watch nightmares.
   While sitting there I ate one huge hamburger. Shit. At least not a meal... so minus the french fries' calories. And just now I had a rye bread with cheese. Well it's not candy and I feel ok. Now zumba and then quick visit at mom's and then back to Helsinki and at night back to home. Some people do think I'm crazy cuz travel 250km in both ways just within a day but... hey. It's Yu's zumba and I haven't been in in three weeks.